A dog named Woof, and a smart Capuchin monkey

Horror yarns may not be what you expect from this blog, but Jack Kilborn's AFRAID is a remarkable gripper which features villainous males who certainly behave like animals (that is an insult to animals) and a couple of animals who behave much better than most of the humans in the story.


Afraid by Jack Kilborn is a horrifying book with a particularly satisfying ending.

I like cozies. I might as well be honest about that. Also happy ever afters. Further, in the interests of full disclosure, you should know that I read AFRAID by Jack Kilborn (with a view to a review) because Joe Konrath dared me to do so. He has a thick skin, and a strong stomach... and anyone who reads AFRAID needs both.


This is not a book to take on a fishing trip, especially if you've left your loved ones at home, alone. In fact, this book ought to come with a free membership of the NRA. You'll want your Brinks alarm turned on, and a loaded shotgun under your mattress if you read AFRAID in bed at night. You might want one of those panic button pendants, too.

Be warned. It is gruesome. AFRAID is the sort of book to be read aloud, in a large group. Maybe journalists who need to be kept up all night --for a slow-to-break story on Airforce One, for instance-- or secret types on a stakeout, would get a bang out of AFRAID.

The villains are seriously, SERIOUSLY, nasty. My own most horrible villain (Insufficient Mating Material) rendered his victims insensible, had his wicked way, then took a small plug of pubic hair for a souvenir. Jack Kilborn's baddies do a great deal more than that. You get a sense of the horrors to come when a faceless bad guy sits on his first victim's bed, and when she asks what he's going to do to her, he says "Everything."

And that's just page 7.

This book contains some sick stuff. Nothing is off limits. Think Hannibal Lecter times five --or six by my count-- with the absolute might and force of the US government backing them up...or at least covering them up.

The pace is relentless, the characterization --unfortunately-- is excellent. You will care about these people. No one deserves to die the way so many do. The writing is crystal clear, like carved coal, dark, sparkling, with more than an evil glint. There's no silliness, no messing about, and nothing strikes you as implausible at the time, even if some of the violence is over the top.

You won't want to put down this book until you reach the last line. It's a good last line. Really good. Yay for the animals!!!

best wishes,

Rowena Cherry
SPACE SNARK™

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What's in your werewolf poop?

Some of us push the envelope... Some of us push it one bathroom fitting too far, no doubt.

The Male

JA Konrath is going to be on my Crazy Tuesday internet radio show at ten a.m. Eastern Time on March 3rd on the strength --and I found it very strong!-- of his werewolf story S.A. which begins with a most unhappy --but healthy-- gentleman crossing a snowy parking lot, carrying a semi-see-through, blue plastic box containing a large stool sample. In fact, it's not a sample. It's the whole enchilada.

He's taking this vigorous specimen to his doctor because there's something unusual about it. There are coins in it. Now, it's nothing like that health insurance advert where the patient has money coming out of the wazoo, as the western oriental ER surgeon explained when making one of those mandatory predetermination phone calls.

The coins are small change. The doctor's advice about unhealthy midnight snacks is... priceless.

After a thorough rectal exam which brings to light many strange things and leads to some unpalatable conclusions in the mind of our hero, he waddles off to search the internet for clues as to whom he's been eating when the moon is full.


The Animal

Just when I thought I'd read every dragonish permutation of bad people tasting good (or bad), or good people tasting bad (or good), JA Konrath comes up with a fresh twist.

This story is a riot. I laughed out loud three times in the first three pages. Of course, there are certain bathroom words that will make me laugh out loud. One of them is poop.

The would-be sci-fi writer in me appreciated the elegance of JA Konrath's solution as regards mass. The hero has a mind-boggling telephone conversation with a were-squirrel... who collects nuts... and he asks both questions that spring to mind, much to this reader's delight.

I'm not going to tell you what "S.A." means, because I enjoyed guessing for as long as the mystery lasted.




"S.A." can be found in the anthology "Wolfsbane and Mistletoe"


However, I came not to praise J A Konrath, but to talk about craft. Poop struck me as a brilliant place to start, when one is creating a convincing introduction to a bewildered werewolf's world. Done right, starting with the scat is an excellent short cut to world-building.

I'm not a gentle reader. I don't suspend disbelief easily. I'm not programmed to trust my author, no matter how outrageously funny he is. Not at first, anyway.

I can give a turd the benefit of the doubt for several reasons. For a start, the narrator is embarrassed about it. That's believable. He's also frightened. He's not Mike Rowe (of Dirty Jobs), so he's probably not inclined to put it through a sieve. A few details suffice.

If there are bits of teeth, chips of bone, coins, buttons, a crucifix, a clump of dead man's beard... I get the picture. I don't worry about the force of a werewolf's bite, or his stomach capacity, or the inhuman speed of his digestive processes whereby the indigestible evidence of his midnight feast ends up in his morning toilet bowl.

There are a lot of ways you could go with an opening premise such as J A Konrath's. Much would depend on your editor, your length, your genre. If the requirements are heart pounding, action packed, humorous, romantic Horror, for instance, there is a limit to how many Tom Clancy-like factual briefings can be included in a 50 page submission.

I love war room briefings as a plot device!

The werewolf hero's search of the Internet was absolutely convincing to me. As I read (and this might not be such a good thing) I visualized Joe (J is for Joe) googling as if he were his own werewolf. That's the sort of thing I do.


JA Konrath and his new Horror-writing persona, Jack Kilborn, aren't my only guests this coming Tuesday. I shall also be joined by Lori Soard who has at least seven books in four genres in print, and several more books that are out of print. Also, visiting will be Michelle Pillow, who writes in almost every genre under the Paranormal umbrella.

Animals that inspire

I'm under deadline at the moment, so cannot take long. If you watch this video of MATING NET, at the end you will be offered --by YouTube-- an array of animal videos that have absolutely nothing to do with me or my work.

I did write a scene inspired by the horse and the golf bag... but then I decided it was not in the best possible taste!





If you are on YouTube, check out my sites RowenaBCherry also rowenabeau also rowenacherry.

I've started to collect some videos for my Cherry Picking radio program... sea otters, manatees, seals.

All the best,
Rowena Cherrry

Males and other animals ... indeed!

Males do some pretty disgusting and unromantic things from time to time. No doubt females do, too.... such as eating the head of the male while, or just before, he impregnates her.

Infant cockroaches, and infant koalas eat their mother's waste. And one type of infant spiders eat their mothers.

When it is a matter of survival, one does what is necessary, no matter how gross.





That was gross!
Moreover, it's not something that inspires me to write a scene for a romance. I just cannot imagine any heroine wanting to kiss him for any reason under the sun any time soon after that.

I would have loved to have been a fly on the nearest object of great attraction to flies, in order to have heard the camera crew's remarks during filming. Unlike SURVIVORMAN, who was filming his own, original series, in Africa during February/March --and who carries 50lbs of his own, self-operated filming equipment--, "Bear" Grylls has a cameraman with him.

Judging by the quality of the video, I'd guess that the cameraman was shaking with laughter.


Males are better equipped to carry out this survival trick. There is a long tradition of unspeakable things that thirsty men will drink. Warm beer. "The stale of horses" to quote from one of Shakespeare's plays with Roman heroes. "Goat's" in a recent film about a Beerfest (involving competitive drinking).




I wonder what kind of toast would be appropriate?
Here's looking at you?
Bottoms up?
Your very good health!

All the best,
Rowena

Hybrids in fiction

Hybrids aren't just cars that run on more than one fuel source.

There are hybrid animals, and hybrid plants which occur either naturally or with the assistance of mankind, also hybrids in Greek and Roman mythology. Some hybrids are sterile, and some are not. Some hybrids are called after a combination of the father's name and the mother's (father's name first).

The mythological creatures do not appear to follow this convention... and in fact, now I understand the convention, my mind boggles over the Manticore (man-lion-scorpion).

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hybrid
wikipedia.org/wiki/Hybrid


The etymology is delightful. According to wikipedia, hybrid comes from the ancient Greek for "son of outrageous conduct."

I could have called my Tigron world's black sabre-toothed tigers ... pangers, or tigthers, but I think that would have complicated matters.

After the discussion with Josh about what carnivores in fiction should and should not eat, I spent several hours reading the ingredients on dry pet food for research purposes, I do have to wonder under what circumstances a dog in the wild would eat corn on the cob. Or rice!

There are some schools of alternative healing thought that claim some of our painful ailments (such as arthritis) are a consequence of us eating fruits or vegetables that we are not adapted for, or to which some of us are allergic. My mother cured very painful arthritic swelling in her hands by giving up all produce in the tomato families. Other people have a problem with potatoes. (Some have a problem but don't know it.)

In Insufficient Mating Material, the hero and heroine are marooned on an island on an alien world, and they have to test food and deal with the possibility that the heroine might not have a tolerance for some of the fruits and vegetables growing there.
They also notice some strange and apparently inappropriate alien animal behaviour and wonder how those animals evolved.

(For those who like to watch such things, it's quite instructive to see some of the videos that You-Tube in its wisdom has decided should be bundled with Insufficient Mating Material... a lot of animals going about their business!)

Best wishes,

Rowena Cherry
Insufficient Mating Material
"racy, wildly entertaining futuristic romance" ~Writers Write

If I could "Ask A Vet..."

As an author of speculative romance, I make up animals as part of my world-building, but that doesn't relieve me of the obligation to be plausible, and also to be responsible.

If I create an apex predator, he has to be constructed like a predator. His eyes should probably face forward, unless there is a very good evolutionary reason (such as convergence -- where he evolves to look like his prey in order to mingle better and pick off prey without having to chase it, or spoil its flavor by frightening it.)

Here are some questions I'd like to ask a vet.

1. I know chocolate is bad for dogs. Is wine bad for big cats?

2. If chocolate is bad for dogs, should it be bad for werewolves?

3. I've read that dogs have a knob that acts as a sort of anchor once mating is underway. What would happen if a knobbly mating was forcibly interrupted?

4. Is it true that cats have "barbs" on theirs?

5. Do wasps (yellow jackets) really get drunk on rotten fruit? And if they do, is it because they like getting drunk? Or is it accidental?

6. Is there still animal cruelty involved in movie-making these days?


Best wishes,
Rowena Cherry

Males and other animals

This is not to say that all males are animals, or that all animals are males. Nor are all animal characters in romances either male or female.

That said, this author, is at the Romantic Times Convention, where thoughts turn to the essential and decorative ingredients that make a romance novel charming, and it occurred to me that across all genres, animals play a role in a good book.

Linnea Sinclair has Furzels in her science fiction romances.
My alien royalty keep black tigers as impressive an intimidating house pets.
Deborah MacGillivray has cats in her historical and contemporary paranormal romances.
I've read about crime-solving cats.
I've loved books about shapeshifters, where men turn into dragons, bears, wolves, seals....

So I thought I'd open up cyberspace to an author blog across all genres, to talk about our animal characters, how animals inspire our creativity and move our plots, and even influence our heroes.

Best wishes,
Rowena Cherry